Shadows on the Snow
by gods sent angel
Summary: After escaping Azkaban, Sirius just wants to get to Hogwarts without remembering anything. But the ghosts of the past aren't so readily disbanned.


A/N: Don't own Harry Potter. If I did, Sirius would have never had that little episode with a rather nasty curtain and there would be a lot more of him in the books. Maybe some more of Remus and Moody, too. And Tonks. Yes.

There's some slightly fluffy stuff, but if you're not into that (I am, sorry) then it's easily construed as platonic…I think. I was (am) tired when I wrote this, so I'm sorry if it's more obvious than I think, but I doubt it is. Enjoy!

scene-

It's so dark.

The large black dog ran silently along the outskirts of the city that lay sleeping near the borders of everything he had locked away. Phantoms of laughter echoed in his brain and he willed himself not to slow down but his body didn't listen to him and his shaggy furred legs slowed to a halt. His unearthly silver eyes were sad as they strayed to the quiet streets and ghostly figures flickered in and out of being to torment him.

"_Catch that, Wortail!"_

The apparition of a young black haired boy with wiry glasses and unruly tresses wavered as a transparent snowball arched gracefully through the air and landed with a nonexistent plop on a stocky young man's head as he laughed and swept up a snowball of his own, the spot he procured one from not moving in the slightest as the vision packed the artillery together. What had ever gone wrong? He vaguely saw two more figures standing back and laughing as he tore himself away and headed off at a dead speed toward the opposite side of the town.

He was panting slightly when he finally reached the tall, beaten old mansion. He whimpered low in his throat as specters of light flickered out of the windows, followed by carnal, animalistic noises and loud thuds of heavy bodies hitting walls and such. Tantalizing whispers of a bucks gleeful braying and the occasional happy yip of a canine punctuated the odd noises, letting on to the fun being had. Barely recovered from his last race against memories the grim tore off into the woods behind the castle now reduced to a shack.

The wind whistling past his ears relieved some of his thoughts and he found himself relaxing a little. Out of the corner of his eye he saw something silvery flicker then vanish. A moment later it returned and stayed. As he passed through a glade his turned his head to see the spirit of a wolf; running happy and free. It returned his look and the devotion and love in its eyes wrenched at his own. Not able to bare the gaze any longer he turned his gaze heavenward to the sparkling stars above. Ironically Uranus and Gaea were desperately against his wish to forget and above him in crystal clear perfection and unwaveringly purity Canis Major shown bright. If a dog could cry from frustration and morose he would have as he tore his eyes from the celestial dance and shot into the trees. He thanked silently that he had not been forced to endure the ghosts of the stag and rat as well; sure he could hold up if he did. It only occurred to him then that the wolf had not flickered when it disappeared, but had actually veered off. He paid it little mind and raced forward still.

At last the welcoming lights of the giant castle from his youth loomed up in front of him, through the trees which were thinning. Slowing to catch his breath he sat on his haunches, panting raggedly as he looked over the school grounds of Hogwarts. The lake, which was now reflecting the dazzling stars above, barely held the outlines of Lupus at its far end, but he felt a pang of rage toward the sky all the same. Barely coming into view was yet another mirage; that of Lily Evans sitting at the edge of the lake reading some book or other. The edges of his mind were becoming fuddled and sanity was now an issue of concern as he saw four more figures materialize nearby. But they quickly faded, or two of them did. A fair-haired boy with large, innocent golden eyes laughed whole heartedly as he turned to face a taller black haired, willowy boy beside him who was also laughing; glittering silvery eyes full of admiration. The shorter boy gave in completely to his mirth and his entire face lit up with joy as his eyes closed trustingly. The sound of the laughter quickly faded, however, and the shaggy black dog was left in silence once more. Sorrow overtook him and without another thought he tilted his head back and let out a mournful howl.

Behind him he heard a rejoining howl and after a moment the awkwardness of that's implication set in. He stopped and looked to his side to see the shadow wolf once more. Golden eyes contrasted its silvery fur and held more wisdom and humanity than any animals' should. They gazed upon him with love and conviction so deep he felt the need to back down. The small sliver of mood somehow managed to work its way through the few remaining trees to alight on the creature of such beauty beside him and its fur glowed as the crescent moon's rays filled it. It smiled almost, a sad, empathic smile; and sauntered towards the school. The urge to follow it almost gave in over common sense and a few paces forward the wolf stopped to glance back. That look said so much; it understood, and it cared. It was devoted, but wanted no followers; not now. Whimpering and dipping his head, the black dog complied, settling down to lay at the edge of the forest and watch. The wolf yipped softly its approval and sped rapidly towards the castle, vanquishing the images of Lily and James and a stout Peter as it went. The images of two boys, both with eyes the color of precious metals, flickered and wavered determinedly before following the others in acquiescence with his wishes for memory-less thoughts.

For a brief second the wolf stood, framed in the light from the doorway which had somehow opened for it, then vanished inside; door closing behind it. The grim laid its head on its forepaws and smiled a canine smile as it drifted off into a dreamless and pleasant sleep.

For the first time in years, there was no past; there was only now.

scene-

Remus Lupin dreamed he was running. He shuddered as he recognized the feelings of dirt under paws and wind in fur. But for some reason he could not comprehend, the wolf was happy. For the last 10 years it had been discontent, moody; a constant thorn in his side to say the least. But now, it was suddenly and for no apparent reason elated. And, Remus noted with some terror, hunting. _Oh no, _he shuddered in his dream-state, _not the village._

But as the wolf continued to frolic it became apparent that his subject of dread was its center of delight, for it headed straight towards Hogsmeade with little distraction. As it emerged from the tree cover, Remus noted that the small town seemed to be entirely asleep. He thanked all of his lucky stars until he saw four children playing in the snow. They had been behind a building at first and he hadn't noticed them, but now, for no reason he could construe, they were quite apparent and in obvious danger. He bit back a choked sob as he anticipated what was to come next, as it always did when he dreamed of the wolf. He tried not to look, not wanting to see their faces when the wolf attacked, but to his dismay it never did. He watched the wolf, which would have clearly seen and heard the children, completely ignore them and begin to pant happily as it moved towards the shack. He was baffled.

Shortly before reaching the shack the wolf paused, then veered for the forest instead; gleefully chasing something. The anticipation and unchecked joy rolling off of his alternate form were overwhelming and dream Remus found himself being washed under by its strong emotions. Then he saw it. A black flicker of movement beside him and then the wolf veered. Remus began to doubt he'd even seen anything to begin with when the wolf suddenly stopped and began tussling about as if anticipating a play attack any moment. A few seconds later confusion washed over him and the wolf looked about, curiously. Then it wiped the look from its face and headed back the way it came as happy as ever.

When it finally sidled up beside the large black object from before, the wolf was happier than Remus ever remembered it being, but he didn't have time to think about the devoted and adoring looks it was shooting at the thing it was running beside because his own emotions were taking over him. He yelped in surprise and fear as the large black dog of Sirius Black's animagus form glanced desperately towards his own animal form and then adamantly tried to ignore it, as if willing it to go away. But that wasn't important. What was important was that Sirius Black was headed straight towards Hogwarts.

Remus tried desperately to divert the wolf him to stop Sirius, but it didn't work. The wolf had sent back feelings of confusion at his adamant demands to attack the other canine and devotion to its pack mate, as well as trust for its long lost running companion and much to Remus dismay a large, if somewhat under toned, feeling of fondness for the creature beside it. He couldn't fathom how, after all these years, the wolf so readily accepted Sirius as if nothing had happened and they'd only been apart over summer vacations. Gritting his teeth he pounded into himself the fact that wolves lived in the present and rarely held memories of the past, especially painful ones. No, the wolf was fully dedicated to Sirius as it always had been and Remus would have to watch as it led the murderer straight to his new home; and worse yet, Harry.

Just shy of exiting the clearing the wolf slowed and let the grim animagi saunter up ahead. It seemed to regard the lake sadly, then its attention was stolen and completely wrapped around something before him. At first Remus didn't see it, but slowly the ghostlike forms of both himself and Sirius in their younger years appeared. They were laughing and enjoying each others' company, both filled with the trust and admiration for each other that the wolf still felt and Sirius, apparent through his previous actions, didn't. The moment played on for a second and the black dog through back its head and howled a low, miserable howl. Remus could feel, not only through the echoed feelings in the wolf, but also in himself, the hurt and sorrow and tormented grief in Sirius cry. He was on the verge of tears himself when he recognized his own howl joining in; caressing and melding with tortured wail of the other canine.

A moment later both stopped and looked at each other with knowing and human eyes. Sirius seemed to shrink back, but the wolf encouraged him to stand; to Remus surprise Sirius did. A silent plea for the grim like creature to stay and hide was also obeyed with no fuss or complaint, only trust and comfort, as the wolf Remus headed back to the castle. It looked back briefly, and Remus felt the compassion and reassurance it was giving Sirius wash through him. Sirius lay down placidly and watched him go with an ease of mind Remus hadn't noticed until now it had been lacking. Quickly the wolf ran back to the castle, banishing the now plentiful ghosts of himself and his friends as he passed. He noted idly that the apparitions of him and Sirius were reluctant to leave, but they did all the same.

Finally they reached the giant entrance way doors and one opened just enough for him. His wolf form paused for a moment to look back before heading inside, the door slipping shut behind it. He chanced a look back as well, wondering what had caught the wolf's attention, and saw Sirius Black lying in peaceful sleep on the verge of the forest near the lake. Shooting a glance skyward he sighed. Then something caught his eye and he couldn't help but smile a little. It seemed as if the forces of the world, including he himself, were very determined to bring him to terms with his friend. And was it just him, or had the constellations Sirius and Lupus moved a little closer together?

scene-

Remus sat up in his bed, not really sure what to make of such a strange dream. He probably would have pondered it further if it weren't for the soft wheezing of an animal panting near his bed. Curiosity warring with caution he moved towards the edge of his mattress to see what it was, and saw only a shimmering ghost of his wolf self. Seeing him peak over the edge of the bed it stopped panting and moved forward with a little whine to butt its nose against his hand. With one last meaningful look it disappeared, leaving Remus very confused. Had it been a dream? He knew only one way to be sure, and he made to head for the window in order to get a look at the forest outskirts. An invisible force pulled him back slightly, as if asking him to just leave the matter be. He smiled softly to himself, both wolf and otherwise and sat back on the bed to look up at what stars were visible in his window from there.

_When a friend asks, there is no tomorrow; only now._ He quoted, understanding the silent plea he had made of himself. He watched Lupus and Sirius dance about each other in the sky. They had definitely gotten closer, he thought, and maybe someday there would be no more confusion or hurt; only trust and friendship.

end-

The quote is from Alexander Drey, if you wanted to know. Uh, Canis Major, for those of you not astronomer buffs, is the larger dog and its non-scientific name is Sirius. Hence the irony. Sirius is chasing a rabbit in the constellations, but if you couldn't see the rabbit, it would just be the greater dog running. Lupus is the wolf, and they're both visible at the same time in the right conditions, though I don't know if it would be in England, since I'm not really sure about global positioning. Um, Uranus if the god of the sky in Greek mythology and Gaea is the goddess of the earth. Yay! Don't hurt me, it just…fell out onto paper while I was trying to write a chapter for something else and I figured I might as well finish it and post it. O.O It was rather awkward. Now please review!


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